The birth of your beautiful new baby sends a flood of all those feel good hormones coursing through you and your partner. My husband and I were on top of the world and, despite my 54 hour labour, I just wanted to stay awake staring at our daughter’s beautiful face. For most of us though, this 24/7 feeling doesn’t last forever. As a breastfeeding Mother, I often end the day just needing my body to myself. We also choose to co-sleep, however my husband’s snoring quickly saw me kicking him out and into our Guest Room! These are just some of the changes we experienced in our relationship after having a baby. All About Zoe’s Blog is all about normalising what parents go through. You are not alone.
The most common changes couples experience are:
- Changes to work load
- Lack of communication
- Sex drive
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, you might be looking for some tips to help the romance. I’ve included my tips below.
Tips to help the romance:
- Share the load
- Think, ‘What can I do for this other person?’ rather than ‘What should they do for me?’
- Divide household chores between you and set each task for different days of the week so you don’t get overwhelmed.
- Seeing things from both sides
- It is difficult for men to understand what it is like to breastfeed and our daily struggles.
- Men do not have the same hormones. They tend to have more difficulty surviving in a sleep deprived state.
- The little things
- Small acts of kindness are sometimes the most noteworthy displays of affection. Cook or bring home dinner. Bring in the washing. Offer a 5 minute foot massage. Tell them they’re doing a great job (really, we all don’t hear it enough).
- You don’t need Anniversaries, Birthdays or even Valentine’s Day as your only excuse to romance
- Organise regular dates – think 3-4 times a month (truly, you need this).
- Send a text saying, ‘I love you’ or ‘You look hot’ if you’re dropping hints *wink*.
- Book them in for a pamper session. If you’re on a budget you can DIY by running the bath, lighting some candles, playing soft music and offering a massage.
- To go out on a date, you might need to enlist the help of family, friends or hire a babysitter. Money may be tight, so team up with other parents to share the cost of a sitter or you can alternate babysitting each other’s.
- Mutual ‘Me Time’
- Try alternating nights or weekends for whose turn it is for some ‘Me Time’. It could be that you get to go to your favourite gym class, catch up with friends, or see a movie.
Always remember that this all started because two people fell in love.
If you are looking for more relatable content, then check out All About Zoe’s Blog at www.allaboutzoes.com where we discuss Beauty, Health, Life & everything in between.
“Like most new Mums, Crystal felt out of touch not only with the world but with herself. Longing for that creative spark (and human connection!) she reignited her love for sharing creatively through Blogging.
Crystal is a Primary Teacher by trade, chocolate addict at heart, married since 2015 (happily married when the kitchen is tidy), a child of the 90s and a proud Mother to her beautiful baby daughter, Zoe. She prides herself in her attachment style parenting and advocating for the normalisation of breastfeeding by following the World Health Organisation guidelines.”